k r i s a n d r o

From Perez and Telegraph,

A SOUTH Australian father and daughter have revealed they are a couple, and have had a child together.

John and Jenny Deaves of Mount Gambier reunited 30 years after Mr Deaves separated from Jenny’s mother.

Jenny was 31 and just two weeks after meeting, father and daughter had sex.

“John and I are in this relationship as consenting adults,” Mrs Deaves told the Nine Network’s 60 Minutes tonight.

“We are just asking for a little bit of respect and understanding.”

Their nine-month-old daughter Celeste, shown on TV, appeared fit and healthy.

Mrs Deaves said soon after reuniting with her father she began to see him as a man first and her father second.

“I was looking at him, sort of going, oh, he’s not too bad,” she said.

“Like you might look at a man across the bar at a nightclub.”

Mrs Deaves brought two children, Samantha and Alex, into the relationship after splitting from her former partner.

Mr Deaves admitted that he “initially” thought having sex with his daughter was wrong.

“Emotions take over, as people no doubt realise, there are times during your life where emotions do rule the heart, it rules the head,” he said.

“I knew it was illegal, of course I knew it was illegal but you know, so what.”

Mrs Deaves said the physical relationship with her father was like “a sexual relationship with any other man”.

For Mr Deaves the sexual relationship was “absolutely fantastic”.

A US psychologist told 60 Minutes the Deaves’s relationship was an example of “Genetic Sexual Attraction”.

He said the phenomenon was not rare, and society would be suprised at how prevalent it was.

The Deaves’s relationship is deemed by Australian authorities as incestuous and therefore illegal.

A South Australian police media spokesman said “the couple was being monitored”.

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Gives a whole different perspective on the cheesy and evergreen line some men say when having sex.

“OH YEAH BABY! YEAH BABY!!! WHO’S YOUR FATHER????”

“Ermm…… You?”

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When news start to report of the world’s 1st pregnant man, many thought it to be a joke or a prank. As people start to dig further into this news, the truth started to reveal and it was in fact….

THE TRUTH.

Introducing…(drum roll), Thomas Beatie, the world’s FIRST pregnant MAN!!!

(Click to enlarge)

THIS IS NOT A JOKE. Not like the PSP story I cooked up.

Thomas Beatie WAS a woman and he is legally male and also married to a real woman named Nancy. Legally male, by doing chest reduction and testosterone therapy but he still kept his female genitalia.

In Singaporean terms the above means he chop off his neh neh, go inject girl girl essence and kept his ‘oyster’ because he don’t want to install a ‘kuku bird”.

Imagine years down the road when his child(it’s a girl) grows up and start to ask of his origins.

Child: “Mummy! I heard that children come from birds called stocks!”

Nancy: “YES MY DEAR!”

“STOP LYING TO ME YOU B***H!!!”

“Er…….”

“Mummy, I actually learn in school today that babies come from Mummies”

“Erm…. yes.”

“Do did I come from you?”

“Er… no.”

“Then from who?”

“From your Daddy actually.”

“So Daddy is actually Mummy?”

“Er… yes but not quite. I am your Mummy.”

“So I have TWO MUMMIES?”

“Yes!” (Wipes sweat)

“So…. Wheres DADDY?”

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Jokes aside, I think he is very brave to step out and tell his story. Before you all start to judge and ask why he would do such a thing, he actually has a reason behind this. His wife Nancy, fell ill and is unable to concieve. He then stopped his medication and started to have menstrual cycles again. Doctor after doctor that they approached refused to do the insemination for them due to their religious beliefs. Relatives shunned them, people laughed at them. Only after a year that they manage to get an anonymous sperm donor and did the insemination themselves.

They did succeed but complications led to a life threatening event and resulted in losing his embryos and his right fallopian tube. His 2nd successful attempt resulted in the healthy girl that he is carrying now.

According to Perez, he is due to conceive on 3rd July and will be appearing on Oprah!

This is one of those ‘wierd but sweet stories’.

Thomas Beatie, I salute him…her… er… him?

(Can’t help taking one more swipe at her… er.. I mean him )

Ruifang and I were at Bugis Junction and I saw Peggy Heng. Ruifang might think otherwise, but I think she is pretty! Anyway, before I digress further, this topic of “Stop looking like Lao Fu Zi!!!” came about when Ruifang noticed a couple sitting behind me.

Ruifang: “Dear! Dear! At my one o’clock, there is a very young couple lor!”

Me: “And then?”

“They VERY YOUNG lor! Especially the guy. I think he is 14 only! You pretend to turn around and look at the food now!”

(I catch a quick glance at them while lousily pretending to look at the food banners)

“WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! The guy look like Lao Fu Zi (老夫子）!!!”

“Yah! And he damn horny lor! Keep kissing the girl! And when they girl cough, he pretend to pat on her chest but actually, he is touching her boobs!”

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If you ask me, hardly ANYBODY look good in ANY kind of mustache. Dark skinned people might carry them well but for fair-skinned ones, especially asians, DON’T.

The presumably 14 yr old kid that we saw falls typically into the category of young male teens not realizing that they are starting to grow hair in places that they don’t notice. If hair grows in their pubic region, of course they notice. That and boobs are all they notice at that age.

The problem is that their facial hair doesn’t sprout overnight like you hairy adults. The STRANDS of hair will appear above the upper lip and somehow, NOBODY teaches them to shave.

Which will make them look somewhat like this.

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Let me illustrate my point further.

Edison Chen

Some might say, “HE WHERE GOT HANDSOME?” But, this guy has bedded more celebrities than you ever will.

What if I doodled a bit of teen mustache on him?

WAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAH!!!!!

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Takeshi Kaneshiro

Regarded to many as the epitome of Asian male beauty.

What if I doodled a bit of teen mustache on him?

WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Oh wait…. Actually, he still looks handsome.

Point is, shave if you can’t grow a full mustache!

But then again, if you can grow a full mustache, don’t grow one like him below.

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I stumbled across this page in wikipedia through digg and found it rather funny, interesting, amusing and sad at times.

The list of unusual deaths on wikipedia shows a chronological list of unusual deaths from as early as 876BC till the present.

My findings after scanning through the list is as follows:

People in the middle ages like to kill by thrusting stuffs through the anus

1016: Edmund II of England died by having a sword thrust in his anus by the soldiers of King Canute while using a primitive latrine.
1322: Humphrey de Bohun, 4th Earl of Hereford was fatally speared through the anus by a pikeman hidden under the bridge during the Battle of Boroughbridge.
1327: Edward II of England, after being deposed and imprisoned by his Queen consort Isabella and her lover Roger Mortimer, was rumored to have been murdered by having a red-hot iron inserted into his anus.

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Clinton wasn’t as unlucky as this French President in 1899.

1899: French president Félix Faure died of a stroke while receiving oral sex in his office.

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Laughter may not be the best medicine

207 BC: Chrysippus, a Greek stoic philosopher, is believed to have died of laughter after watching his drunk donkey attempt to eat figs.

1410: Martin I of Aragon died from a lethal combination of indigestion and uncontrollable laughing.

1599: The Burmese king Nanda Bayin reportedly “laughed to death when informed, by a visiting Italian merchant, that Venice was a free state without a king.

1660: The Scottish aristocrat, polymath and first translator of Rabelais into English, Thomas Urquhart, is said to have died laughing upon hearing that Charles II had taken the throne

1975: On 24 March 1975 Alex Mitchell, a 50-year-old bricklayer from King’s Lynn literally died laughing while watching an episode of The Goodies. According to his wife, who was a witness, Mitchell was unable to stop laughing while watching a sketch in the episode “Kung Fu Kapers” in which Tim Brooke-Taylor, dressed as a kilted Scotsman, used a set of bagpipes to defend himself from a psychopathic black pudding in a demonstration of the Lancashire martial art of Ecky-thump. After twenty-five minutes of continuous laughter Mitchell finally slumped on the sofa and expired from heart failure.

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Probably the 1st Wii induced death

2007: Jennifer Strange, a 28-year-old woman from Sacramento, died of water intoxication while trying to win a Wii console in a KDND 107.9 “The End” radio station’s “Hold Your Wee for a Wii” contest, which involved drinking large quantities of water without urinating. She placed second in the contest.

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Can’t help but laugh at his death

458 BC: The Greek playwright Aeschylus was killed when an eagle dropped a live tortoise on him, mistaking his bald head for a stone. The tortoise survived.