Goodbye Junior. I Love You.
1st January, 1997. I still remember the day when Junior 1st stepped into our house. I am sure because it was the night before I started my repeated Sec 3 year in the Express stream. My brother, Benne, had been wanting a dog and it happens that a friend of my Mum’s had a dog whom he had trouble with at his place.
Junior was the dog’s name.
He was a matured puppy and created quite a lot of trouble at his owner’s place because he was extremely horny and harassed the female dog to no end. Demand met supply and he came to our house that evening. He was scared at 1st and constantly ran around the living room, not wanting to settle down. I used to sleep in the living room at that point in my life and when the lights when off, he started to be more adventurous and sniffed at everything he could lay his wet nose on.
Junior came to our house ‘toilet’ trained and he would only pee on sheets of newspaper that we placed in the kitchen. Even that was rare as he would usually hold his pee in and patiently waited for the 3 walks he will get everyday from either my Mum, Benne or myself. What started off as 10min walks along the patch of grass at the front of my HDB void deck became 30 min walks around the neighbourhood park and soon became 45mins to 1 hour walks around the park AND some parts of the neighbourhood.
He was a crafty one.
He tries very hard to stretch his walks into new territory every time he gets a chance to go downstairs. I always joke with my friends that we don’t walk him. He walks us. The people who see us on his walks will often see him pushing ahead with us barely keeping up on the taut leash. Mind you, he was a bloody strong Shih Tzu/Maltese cross breed. He will sniff and pee on anything he fancies and controls each pee to a dribble so that he can mark his territory as much as he could. I remember his favourite thing to pee on are leafy branches that fell or got cut from trees. I used to try and think dog and thought that he knew it was impossible to climb a tree to pee on the top branches and this is his way of going around it. He even occasionally grin at me while peeing at the branches.
He loves bak kwa, durian, char siew rice and most of all, chicken. Junior was pretty much a lazy dog who did things his way and only responds to few words/sentences like his name and “chicken”. The last word being the most responsive actually and probably would have been his name had he not came to our house with one already.
His love for human food did not overrule the insistence of us to have him on a proper diet and so we still kept his main diet to canned and dry dog food. He soon became a plump dog even with such a diet and frequent walks. But the weight gain was pretty welcomed as there was once when he was skinny enough to disappear from the house through the metal grilles on our gate. There was another instance when he disappeared from the house and had us all frantically looking for him as he crosses roads even if there was a F1 race going on the very same road.
Junior used to be closest to me as I would be the one to bring him on the majority of the walks and fed him food everyday. Years past and my time at home lessened and so was the bond Junior had for me. He soon identified my Mum as his owner and was extremely protective of her. So protective that Benne and me couldn’t wake my sleeping Mum without him growling at us and looking like he was ready to chew us slowly from the toes up if he had to.
My Mum loved him as much as she would love a dear son. And he loved her back the same, if not more.
Mum once slipped and fell in the toilet and concussed while all alone at home. It was Junior’s licking of her face and whimpering that woke her up. She had fractured her back and had to crawl her way to the living room to make a call for help. I don’t know what would had happened if Junior wasn’t there to help her gain conciousness.
Years pass and I spend even lesser time at home. So much that he would bark at me when I approach the door as though he sensed a stranger approaching.
I still love him dearly and I treasured the 2nd class citizen attitude he had for me whenever I am home.
I love disturbing him with my morning breath.
I love to tickle him till his legs spasm uncontrollably.
I love massaging him and stopping to hear him give an audible sigh of shiokness.
I love to grind my knuckles in his ear and watch him tilt his head towards the massaged ear.
I love to laugh when he sometimes let his tongue roll out from the side.
I love him.
Months back, we started to see a decline in his overall health. He was more grumpy, less energetic during walks and recently, a little hard of hearing at times. His once thick and rich white fur is a little sparse and his eyes lost the dark glassy glow that he was graced with when younger. We resigned it to his age and let nature take it’s course.
23rd March, 2010. My Mum brought Junior on one of his walks and he suddenly collapsed after making an attempt to hop over a small gap of a drain. All his 4 paws were off the ground and he whimpered a couple of times before going dead silent. Mum frantically picked him up and realized he wasn’t breathing and she couldn’t feel any heartbeat at all. She could see the whites of his eyes and his ghastly white tongue and held his limp body in her bosom as she cried; thinking that he died. She kept kissing him and calling his name and Junior regained conciousness but remain dazed. She immediately rushed to The Animal Clinic in Clementi and unfortunately the vet was out for lunch but an attendant determined that it wasn’t a heart problem as Junior was able to walk by that point in time.
Noon. 24th March, 2010. Junior has not ate and only drank for the last 2 days and my Mum brought him to visit the same veterinary clinic. The vet who attended to Junior told my Mum that Junior’s heart was found to be beating weakly and prescribed a medication to help his heart condition.
8pm. 24th of March, 2010. I came back home after work and Junior barked at me approaching the gates like any other day. Little did I know that that was the last time I would ever hear him bark at me. He looked weak as I came into the house and it was to be expected as he has just started his 1st day of medication.
I went out for a run and came back around 10pm. I would usually stroll slowly home from the park after a strenuous run and I don’t know why but I fast walked home this time. I opened the gate to find Mum and Benne, seated on the floor; their eyes were red with fresh tears and their eyes darted to the bottom of the sofa. Mum told me that Junior ‘cannot make it already’. He had a similar fainting spell and peed uncontrollably when he lost conciousness. I check him out and he was lying underneath the sofa, awake but looking weak. I still remember his eyes darting to my face as though wanting to stand up but unable to.
Part of me wanted to scream at my Mum and brother for giving up on him so easily but I bit my tongue. I cannot blame them as I did not see him black out and they probably resigned to fate on such a sight. I asked my Mum for the clinic’s number and managed to reach the same vet who directed me to Mount Pleasant Animal Hospital and we all rushed down to the hospital. Junior was placed in an oxygen tank and looked to be doing better while a vet was being called in to take a look.
After a good 40 mins or so, the vet finally made it to the hospital and after checking junior out for an initial assessment, she determined him to have a grade 3 heart problem on a scale of 1 to 5. He had to be taken out of the oxygen tank to take 2 x-rays to confirm the assessment and to find out other problems. From the x-ray, it was certain that it was quite bad. His heart was engorged and his lungs with filled with fluids which explained why he had difficulties breathing. At this point in time, he was clearly panting way heavier than before and took some jabs which were supposed to help him clear the fluids.
He had to be hospitalized for the night for his condition to stabilized and thinking that he would rest better without seeing us around, we left for home.
Barely minutes after reach home around 1am+, I received a call from the vet and she said Junior blacked out and she managed to resuscitate him and will not call me again if everything is well. I told my Mum and brother about it and returned to my com to finish up some work. I then received a call from the vet and she said Junior blacked out again and this time she was having difficulty reviving him. I choked up on the phone while she told me that I should go back to the hospital if I wanted to. Thinking that he was as good as dead, I choked in tears as I roused my brother and told my Mum about the call. She immediately wailed and called out Junior’s name. The same heart busting wail that I only heard one other time when my Grandma died.
We rushed down by taxi to the hospital in tears and I was surprised to see Junior still alive, albeit barely. Vet told us that she had to extract blood and fluid out of his lungs to save him and it dawned upon me on her tone and choice of words that we should consider putting him to sleep.
And so we did.
Before the lethal dose was injected into Junior, we stood around him while my Mum whispered her’s, Benne’s and my love for him. In between sobs, she told him that we didn’t want him to suffer. After some time, she motioned for my brother to say his goodbyes and he walked over to kiss him for the last time. I was standing some distance away at that point in time; lost in thoughts, hands folded; probably half wanting to be the strong one and not wanting to accept the fact that the dog I loved for the last 13 years is going to die.
I finally stepped forward and reached out to pat his forehead. As if he was waiting for me to do that and he suddenly took a few hard breaths and stopped breathing. I called for the vet and the attendant immediately asked if he should proceed. Before he could finish his sentence, I said “Yes.”
2am. 25th March, 2010. Junior died on that table.
Junior led a very happy life. He brought joy and laughter to this family and was loved fiercely by us.
I miss him terribly and I love him so very dearly. All I hope is that he died, knowing that we all loved him like a brother, a son and a dear friend.
Goodbye Junior. I Love You.
