Almost 11 Months Together – WHY HAVEN’T QUARREL?
I was at KuKuNehNeh’s place after work and rested on her bed, Cleopatra style, when she turned over and asked,
“DEAR!”
(By the way, she likes to grab my attention just like that and it always seems as though she will say something shocking that will rock my socks off)
Me: “Yes?”
“Time pasts so fast! We are together for almost 11 MONTHS!“
“YEP!”
“And we haven’t even quarrel before hor?”
“Hmmmmm…. No leh. But there was once when you were super dulan (pissed) at me for something that I blogged.”
“Yah… But we never quarrel what!”
“So you want to quarrel lar. Can lor.”
“No lar! SIAO!”
.
It isn’t the first time that she said it out loud that we don’t quarrel and it’s quite amazing looking back at my past relationships. It’s easy to just say that KuKuNehNeh is easily pleased but I think it’s more about her being a very appreciative woman. I can’t be that different of a person from my past relationships and now and so it is highly likely that I am doing the same as a boyfriend.
It dawned upon me that if any couple doesn’t quarrel, it can also mean that they try to hard to accomodate each other and keep all their unhappiness inside and it isn’t good because such bottled feelings might accumulate over time and burst out when you least expect it.
I also know of too many couples who quarrel frequently and through it, they totally understand each other but the relationship also gets strained over time. And do note that ‘understanding each other’ doesn’t mean that the problem is solved. Understanding your other half hates the fact that you always stay out late doesn’t mean that you will stop your partying life.
For both extreme cases, there are always examples of couples who stay together without ever quarrelling or those who fight it out regularly but they are so rare!
What’s the best solution IMHO? If there is something that is bothering you, talk it out NICELY. If both of you can come up with an agreeable solution, adopt it. If there is something that cannot be agreed on…
Agree to disagree. And move on.
I think KuKuNehNeh and I are mostly working on this principle so far. I may be mistaken though. If I suddenly disappeared and stopped blogging. You guys know who to prosecute.
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lonestarz Says:
June 26th, 2008 at 9:49 pm
My previous relationship was 11 months and we quarrelled throughout the 11 months.
Keep it up! =)
June 26th, 2008 at 9:54 pm
Please la…
No quarrel then treasure this time together…
Don’t go think so much…
Waffles last blog post..Graduated!
June 26th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
I think it depends on what kinds of quarrels and argument? It’s better to talk it out rather than keeping everything to yourself. I always do that with my other half, sometimes we argue almost the simplest things and come to think of it, it can be really silly.
Anyway, it’s all about giving and receiving. But sometimes, it spice up ur life
Jacelyns last blog post..My Sexy Butt on Papers
June 26th, 2008 at 10:06 pm
I guess the keyword is balance? Don’t make noise means bottling things up? Make noise also don’t seem to contribute to help make the relationship work? But I do agree on the part of talking things out nicely!
paceds last blog post..On The 4th Day In Las Vegas
June 26th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
Mine has been peaceful and no fights for almost 2 yrs, than small pissing off but still no fights. But one day it happened. And it was VERY BAD. Glad we pulled through and have been happy but still with rare small fights.
Treasure what you have.
June 27th, 2008 at 12:03 am
You have a great relationship. May all things go well! Will there be a chance for a ping wedding?
June 27th, 2008 at 2:10 am
as long as nothing is being bottled up it’s ok bah. keep everything to yourself 1 day volcano explosion very jia lat. (is speaking from experience haha)
healthy arguments are good.
sometimes it’s gd to trash things out.
Wendys last blog post..Bah.
June 27th, 2008 at 8:12 am
Alamak you stoopid kotek!! The hint is sooo bladdy obvious!!!
You know what they say about make-up sex right?? Ok ok. Last chance!!!
What is KuKuNehNeh trying to hint???
JayWalks last blog post..Back From Retirement
June 27th, 2008 at 9:57 am
Yay!
haha. I’m with my bf for 1 yr 1 month + and we haven’t quarreled too.
We prefer discussions that have a good conclusion than quarreling and not solving any problems =)
Keep it up!
June 27th, 2008 at 10:17 am
Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving comment.
My boy is recovery well and I hope there’s no infection at all.
You are very blessed to have such a nice girlfriend and of cos she too. May your relationship remains blissful.
June 27th, 2008 at 1:52 pm
*envy envy* really nice to hear this
Tianhongs last blog post..Cock singlish from 98.7FM
June 27th, 2008 at 11:18 pm
ermmm….no leh I nv bottled things up…
krisandro is really too nice to make me angry!
EVERYBARDY “AWWWwwwwww…..”
HE IS A SUPER NICE GUY!!!!
*GRAB TIGHT TIGHT/CHAIN UP LEGS/HIDE IN CABINET.
fangzs last blog post..
June 28th, 2008 at 12:16 pm
Cool shit!!!! ^_^
No one likes quarrel i bet!
Right now, me n my bf oledi gt some arguement..
yah..but we argue about food in msn/sms/phone..
How’s stupid is that? lol~!
Reginas last blog post..My New Full Length Mirror!
June 29th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
heh, it’s good that you and kknn don’t argue and agree to disagree
keep it up and hope you 2 would never have to argue, it’s dead tiring leh…
xinyuns last blog post..My latest toy…
June 29th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Jawker> Such a coincidence!
Waffle> I think she is ‘semi proud’o it actually
Jacelyn> Yup, you are right abt talking it out. Some spice is good as well, but not too much… I can’t take it. Haha.
paced> Yup! A good balance is essential. But it also varies with each couple. Some survive with more confrontations and some prefer peacetimes.
claudia> Wah… I haven’t pass the 2 yr mark.. Jialat!
ignorantsoup> Thanks! Er.. Ping Sponsored wedding? OH YES! What’s Uzyn’s email again?
Wendy> Yah… i scared of volcano explosions. Thrash things out is good… but do it nicely lar…
JayWalk> Somehow, this is so familiar to some thread in the bar… wahahahahahah
Jasmine> Heh! Same! I am glad you guys r doing it too.
LZmommy> Thank you for your kind words!
Tianhong> Mai envy lar. You’ll come to it eventually
fangz> Er… dun tell the world your fantasies can?
Regina> You r the quarreling kind mah. Not a surprise. WAHAHHAHAA!
xinyun> Yup~ I’m sure you understand.
April 16th, 2009 at 2:39 pm
with my hubby for abt 3yrs plus.. i think we hv like erm.. like 2 big fights? small fights.. also very very seldom..
rachs last blog post..sympton of pre-matured aging
April 17th, 2009 at 3:31 pm
@rach> Good for you! Hopefully mine will carry on. It’s at 20 months and counting now.